Wise and strong
Components of a great leader
Leading like a god in Olympus
We go to war as a team on the battle field between the lines
High confidence and brave
I show no mercy in the war
As a descendent from the titans
There’s a lot that must be proved
I battle to the end
Keeping watch on all my brothers
We will never back down
We will never give up
This is Olympus
This is Moanalua
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Hi Austin,
ReplyDeleteGood job! I like your poem. I like how you compared Zeus to not just you, but also Moanalua. To me it seemed like you were comparing Zeus to either Moanalua football or Moanalua baseball team. That was a good comparison. The flow of your poem is good. Although I don't know much about Zeus, to me it seems like you put Zeus into your poem well.
Good Job Austin!! Keep it up!:)
Austin,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your allusive poem and it was quite interesting comparing yourself to the "great" Zeus. Zeus was known as the highest god in Greek mythology, and he definitely had to display qualities such as bravery and courage. Me personally being your friend, I'd definitely say that you could compare yourself to Zeus in a sense that you really don't fear anything and face any challenge. But to critique your poem, if I were to do the five-step process, it would work. I stated my first impression earlier, and I definitely think the main idea is how you face up to anything boldly, and it's awesome how you also included Moanalua on there
Hi Austin,
ReplyDeleteNice job on your poem, first developing the qualities of Zeus and then the comparison to you and to Moanalua.
What's needed is more detail about your own life, your leadership and activities, and your "linege"...the part about descending from Titans, that supports the comparison to Zeus.
Nice job on using the five step process, Jonas!
mrs s